school options and tidbits

The school conundrum:

In the fall, I picked a woman's brain about school options for Kay. Co-ops sounded good, but that's only 1 day a week. The other 4 days are homeschool days. 

Why is homeschooling in someone else's home not a thing? 

She mentioned Jan - lives far away, but schools other people's 'troubled' kids. 

Jan's name came up again in late January when conversing with my new friend, who is so lovely. Her daughter went to college with Jan's daughter. I emailed Jan, describing Kay's issues. While we were at ND for Mini's parents' weekend, Jan emailed me:  I THINK KAY MIGHT BE A GOOD CANDIDATE FOR MY GROUP. 

Coach and I met with Jan on Tuesday. It was a hike. On the drive I told Coach 'this is silly because we don't even know how much tuition is and we'd have to find Kay transportation.'  He agreed, but - No stone unturned, etc. 

Kay and I made these GF date bars on
 Friday after school. This reminds
me why I don't keep GF
 sweets in the house. 

Jan blew us away. Impressive and inspirational. She was homeschooling her own 9 kids (youngest is a junior in hs and she attends Jan's 'school') when she noted a neighbor family struggling with destructive issues. After 3 visits to their house, saying she'd homeschool their kids - they agreed. 

For the last 15 years, she's teaches kids who've suffered crisis, displacement, or trauma along with her kids. She doesn't accept payment. WHAT? This is her ministry. She feels called. She never advertises. God sends her kids that need her. 

We agreed to pray about it, and next she'd like to meet with Kay. 

There is another family that drives from a town just north of us. Carpool possibility?  I have an outside the box thought on how to get her there. It's a stretch, but my mind's stretchy like that. 

It feels like an atmosphere that promotes personal growth with individualized attention, as in 'meet her where she's at' academically. Kay's immature and this setup feels like the right pace, like a stepping stone to get caught up on life. Also, no homework. That'll allow for her to join a swim team or something in the evenings, and to read  - maybe read more with me.  

This has weighed on us for months. I'll keep you posted. 

Other tidbits:

• Dad came home Sunday afternoon. I think? No communication from my shitsters. I was at the hospital Sunday morning when the doc said he could go once the oxygen was delivered to his house. 
• A  D2 coach reached out to Curly Saturday. School in SC. The coach wants to zoom early this week to show Curly their style of play. The plot thickens.
• Reg arrived home Friday, and as always is ready and willing to help me. 
• We watched the 2nd half of Life of Pi, Sunday night after Coach got home. He taught a class in NC for the weekend. 
• I'm hoping to sneak away to go to a party at Tank's college buddy's family's house in Grand Rapids, MI on Saturday. Um, Coach is away teaching again. Kay has science fair and one fam member is supposed to volunteer. Reg wants to do the parade, but then can be home to watch Kay and Rae. Mini's returning from a mission trip (all her friends went to Cabo) on Friday and she wants to go to road trip to the party with Tank and I. It's complicated, but I'm nothing if not a 'where there's a will there's a way' type. 

*****

Any tidbits to share? Do you have people ready and willing to help you - at work, at home? Do you think I can pull off a disappearing act on Saturday and make the road trip party thing happen? 

Hoping Dad's hospital stay is brief

HOSPITAL:  Yesterday my brother Pat called. "Ann's driving dad to the hospital." I believe Dad had a CT scan (or whatever) earlier in the day- might have pneumonia. My sisters have created a separate sib group chat without me, so I don't get messages in real time and I don't get all the details, particularly about doctor appointments, etc. Ann is a nurse and she manages all of their medical issues.  

After I finished babysitting, I sat with my mom and her caregiver, who was at their house until 6:00 pm. Marie drove down from Milwaukee to stay with my mom overnight. My brother, Mike told me Marie would be there around 6. Went straight to the hospital, knowing I'd be with Nana, but didn't communicate the change of plans. She arrived at 8:00. I said hello. She didn't respond. Then I said hello again, and she snapped "I said hello. You just can't hear." What now? Then she hid in the bedroom. When I left, I called "Bye Marie." Crickets. 

It's unfortunate that my sisters are gonna act like ass hats, but why should today be different than any other day. 

I'm hoping to see my dad this evening. Coach flies to NC this afternoon to teach a class. He'll be gone all weekend, so that's not great timing. 

When my mom facetimed him before I left, Dad sounded great - good spirits, explaining to my mom that they'd done blood work and that they were just getting him set up in a room. 

Dad:  Can you see me? 

Nana:  Yes, you look more handsome than usual.

Dad:  (laughing) I doubt that.

Nana:  I know, but I just wanted you to feel good. 

Dad:  I gotta go - this nurse is trying to work on me.

Nana:  Well, don't let her work on you too much.

Dad:  It's a HE. 

Nana chuckled:  OH!

Nana seemed much better after their chat. "He sounded good." I agreed. I assured her he just needs to stay there to get the right medicine. The caregiver told me that he had been really tired, but hadn't really been coughing. 

She also told me that Kay and Rae joined she and my mom for a walk on Friday. The girls went there after school until Lad could get them after work while we were in South Bend. The caregiver told me that my sisters sort of grunted and seemed a little 'off' when she told them that the girls had walked with them. Of course. 

Lad said when he picked them up from Nana's house, Dad said "Lad, these are good girls." Lad told Coach, I think Da's getting soft. Ha. 

I'm hopeful, and dare I say confident, that Dad'll bounce back. He'll be 86 in May. His body is failing, but his mind is sharp-ish. Nana has Alzheimer's and I noticed in the last few weeks another decline. Her body is not showing signs of slowing down. 

DELETE ANGST:  While at Nana's, I tried to delete photos from my phone. My cell is suffering with an overflowing memory. I deleted some contacts this am, thinking I was deleting the conversations. *sigh* I wave the white flag. I really do not know how to use devices - especially if it involves deleting stuff. Ugh. 

*****

This is a photo that I stumbled on when I was deleting stuff. That red donkey toy that the kids in the daycare ride on looks like he's sitting on the couch watching TV. I think someone moved him to the couch to vacuum.

 How do you store your photos? 

Fig-a-licious Fourth Week of February

I've not been great at posting the joy I've found over here in 'babies-R-everywhere,  basketball wrapped up, and the Christmas tree stand just got put away last week' land. I'm bound and determined to write a post about my FIGs. If you're unfamiliar with Elisabeth's wonderful FIG (finding joy in gratitude) movement, click here to check it out. 

Week of Feb. 22-28th

Sunday:  DELETED EMAILS  

I deleted tens of thousands of emails. I only have 13k left. Um, this might make you cringe, but I was at 90k a few short months ago. A weight lifted. 

I've worn this blouse
 before, but I
think of it as 'dressy'
 and I'd not paired
 it with jeans. I wore
this Friday night after
sharing photo options with
 Mini and she voted this as #1.

Monday:  WARDROBE OPTIONS/no shopping trips necessary  

I pulled a selection of cute tops from my closet, trying to map out (in advance) what I'd pack for Mini's upcoming parents' weekend. This is twofold joyous:  

• helpful to know what I was gonna pack in advance. 
• Also, joy in not feeling like I needed to buy anything. I'm focusing on searching my own closet and shopping Mini's castoffs. I have options. Cute options, no less. I could, and maybe I will, draft an entire post about shopping Mini's castoffs. 

Tuesday:  NO GUTS NO GLORY  

Curly's team lost. Her basketball season ended. This was sad, but her amazing high school basketball career has been a joy. Sitting in the stands, I reflected on how we struggled to win a game last year and how the varsity girls went forward and met with the AD, but only if the principal was present - in order to hold him accountable. They insisted on a legit coach this year, which meant they had to remove the guy who they'd stuck in the position. He was dreadful. It took two meetings, a promise to involve the media, and the guts (Curly!) to call the admin out when they contradicted themselves. They shook things up. The woman who coached this year was the assistant when Mini played, and she was the assistant for Curly's 1st and 2nd varsity years, one of which was her sophomore year when we took 4th in state. She agreed to be varsity coach, because she's wild about Curly. We so appreciate her as she was a gift to this team. 

Wednesday:  NAP  

I stayed up late Tues night chatting with Ed. The fact that he came to Curly's game and then came home to stay with us was joyous. I loved our chat, but I woke up stupid-early and was bleary eye'd while babysitting. Joy:  Ed watched two tots so I could nap while the 3 infants slept in the morning. A 25 minute nap is a game changer. Who knew? 

What's this? Thinning
out the bulk,
 creating shape, and giving
 her curls a chance.

Thursday:  STATIONARY BIKE, A LITERAL GIFT & KAY'S HAIRCUT

Our friends gifted us their really nice stationary bike a few years ago. When it's too cold to run, this is amazing. I'm grateful for indoor cardio. Also, Kay's haircut was causing some drama, but I leaned into the hair dresser and everyone is happy with the end result. 

Friday:  I'LL RUN IN THIS WEATHER

This day was nuts -scheduled down to the minute. I had to get both little girls to the dentist from their two different schools and then back again. Mini helped get Kay to the dentist, but the rest was on me. This was not joyful, but I learned to never schedule that way again. The weather was outstanding and I went for a run while they were getting their teeth cleaned. 

Saturday:  GOOD NEWS EMAIL

I'd reached out to a woman who homeschools a group of children - kids who've been displaced, suffered trauma, etc. She responded while we were at Mini's parent weekend, saying she thinks Kay might be a good fit for her school. We hope to meet with her this week to learn more. How much? Plus we'd have to hire someone to transport her, because it's not close to home. 

bonus good things:  

• The girls had a choir thing in the city, and moms offered to help out with transportation
• we couldn't be at the choir event, but Tank took the L there and attended it
• Lad babysat and Curly (had considered coming with us) was home to help
• despite a rough night in the hotel room:  think heating like a sauna, needing to switch to AC and finally turning the whole thing off - I managed to sleep late enough to not have a zombie brain

*****

What things are you grateful for last week? Fill in the blank:  "When my email creeps past 'X' emails, I start to unravel." Anyone in your world show a no-guts-no-glory side and live to be glad they did?  Do you have success digging around in your closet before rushing off to the mall?

Two months later . . . the gift that keeps on giving & the end of an era

Gift that keeps on giving:

Unrelated:  look how freaky
 this is. Lil Curly
 was feeding a doll and
 I was taking her
 picture . . . and then
I noticed - it's like
 she's matching
outfits with this
 mangy ass doll
 from my daycare 

A week before Christmas, I asked Lad to grab the girls for us after therapy while we were at Curly's away game. He took the girls to his house. They watched a movie. He fed them dinner. He texted us photos of the girls curled up with his dogs with a message, "I should do this more often."

I responded with, "Yes, you should. Ha ha." 

For Christmas, he gave us three weekend babysitting coupons - overnight deals! We can go away and he will watch the girls. My favorite gift. There were a few restrictions. 

• Can't be redeemed on back to back weekends. 
• Must have at least two weeks notice. 
• No more than two consecutive nights. 

Do I think the fact that he's been dating a nice girl for 3-4 months has influenced this side of him, Yes I do. 

Coach and I are heading to Notre Dame on Friday for the parents' weekend created by Mini and her 16 closest girlfriends. Lad's watching the girls. The two girls have a choir event at a church in Chicago Saturday that will mean that they're gone most of the day. That'll be a nice break for him to deal with his dogs and workout, as I've arranged for the girls to get a ride with another family. Tank is planning to go to the church to watch their performance. 

Fingers crossed that all goes smoothly. I've got some DVD movies rented from the library. There are loads of leftovers in the fridge. I think Curly will be around too. 

Sad, but bound to happen:  

Curly's season ended Tuesday. We lost. We had to keep all 5 of our girls in for the entire game. No bench. We have two starters out injured. The other team had 12 girls that they rotated in and out. We put up a good fight, even tied it - in the 3rd quarter. 

Curly was sad, of course. The end of an era. Coach told her to go down swinging. He didn't want her to lose and feel like she didn't shoot enough or rebound enough. She hit some amazing 3s and rebounded the hell outa the ball. 

A rare Ed Visit:  

Ed took his life in his hands by riding the L to the game. It was south of the city, and not the safest stretch of the L. He's hanging out at our house for a few days. So fun. I cooked dinner the last few nights, so he can take leftovers home and deliver some to Tank, who lives across the street.

Other news:  

Map of where we're
staying in FL.

I zoomed with my GI doc Wed. morning. I'm gonna try something called Reflux Gourmet to the tune of $28/ 8 ounce tube. 

Who's ready for a fun weekend vising Mini? ME!

Before heading to ND, I'm planning to make 7 layer taco dip. Maybe we can hang out in the hotel lobby and chow down. I cannot show up at an event with these girls and NOT have 7 layer dip - especially since I once packed it in my checked bag and flew with it to tailgate with them in NJ. Right? 

Oh, and I found a different Florida rental. A little further south. 3 bedrooms vs 2. Located on a small beach. A hot tub. A family room area where we can watch family movies. This is gulf side, a spot called Ruskin. 

*****

Any gift you got that keeps giving? Anything you're looking forward to this weekend? 

Healthy, wealthy, and wise: one outta three ain't bad & guess how won the Regional Champs?

If you're puzzling over this riddle, I'm wise - was that not obvious? 

Honestly, I am healthy, but this post is about a few nagging health issues that thankfully aren't life threatening, but I'm gonna whine a little.

***

Reg health update 1st:  Reg and I zoomed with his neurologist Friday. Appt set up months ago in order to refill his RX. Viruses can lower the threshold for seizures. Well, damn that sucks. But good to know. I wonder if Reg had covid and didn't know it - his throat hurt so much. 

* I didn't go to his mom's weekend. Very few freshman moms could attend. The moms I knew with older sons weren't going. "Son didn't tell me till last week, and I'm in Hawaii," etc. The fraternity guys who planned it last minute:  Tell us you're a college guy without telling us. 

***

ACID TRIP:  Part of the reason I didn't go . . . for the last week or so, I was struggling to swallow. I can swallow, but my food was taking the slow boat to China to get down, and I had the bad taste in my mouth I've had on and off over the years. I googled it. One cause: PREGNANT. Easy to rule out. Another was acid. 

Aha!

I take an antacid RX 30 min before I eat every morning. This started around the time I was diagnosed with SIBO and I was a hot HOT mess. Sleeping only 3-4 hours a night. The antacid has helped, but why extra acid? I've never 'done acid' so what gives? I don't experience heartburn, praise the good Lord. 

Last week though, the gas (both ends) - off the charts. Sometimes I'd have no appetite. Steer clear from chocolate and coffee if acid is your enemy - both things I don't do much of/at all - respectively. 

I've been waking early. I can't complain, because still getting 7-8 hours, but for the past few months - I've been sleeping 9-10 hours on the weekends when possible. Which does make me wonder, why do I need that much sleep? Esp when I generally get close to 8 on the weekdays. My guess is:  autoimmune crap. My body's tired. 

I'm happy to report that later in the day Saturday symptoms improved. I slept over 9 hours that night. My food is going down. Still, what the what? I've emailed my doc.

My fear:  Long time readers will recall the undiagnosed pain in my side. (would wake me up) Did you know I tried to get in with Mayo Clinic? No openings. No waiting list. WTF? The GIs I've seen (5 or 6, who's counting?) waved the white flag. RX to manage my issue (it helps b/c I can sleep), but should we find out what's wrong with my side? 

In the land of make believe, where horrorrs lurk - I fear that the pain that they could never 'see' grew (in whatever form) and that's messing with my pipes. 

With this ring, I thee . . . ouch

***

THOSE AREN'T SAUSAGES (there my fingers):  I saw a rheumatologist for a few years. He gave me RX for my pinky swelling/pain. It's moved into the ring fingers. My wedding ring will never come off. I guess that means Coach is stuck with me. But really, at what point does it become unsafe to wear a ring that I cannot remove? 

This pinky is the
worse of the two.

I stopped taking the pinky pain med in June. It took the edge off, but not a cure. I decided I'd rather skip a med that I could live without. 

                                    ***

Curly's team won regional championship Friday night in our home gym. It was a close. She shot a 3 early-ish in the game, and Coach said, "Too deep", but it went in and I stared him down:  Shut, shut your mouth. Then she missed several 3s (but still had 19 or our 34 pts), and when she was about to shoot a 3 at the start of the 4th quarter (?), my brother Pat said, "No, if your shot's off, drive to the hoop." She hit that 3 - which was clutch - gave us a bit of a lead, and I melted into the bleachers. I lay there like a cartoon that falls on the stairs and takes the shape of the stairs. I needed to recover. 

Curly was interviewed afterwards, and there's an article written about her/her team. Her coach said the nicest things. If you'd like to read it, email me 'Curly article' and I'll share it. My email is my IRL last name followed by the word clan and the number 7. At yahoo. If you need nothing extra to read, I see you. ;)

***

Longer than intended, so tell me:  What food do you try to avoid? Do you skip meds that aren't necessary? Are your rings removable? Anything exciting happen in your world over the weekend? 

5 oops Friday (or 4 and a dilemma)

The comparison photo . . . 

1. pumpkin bread batter, just add cellular device. (Do not try this at home.)

Rushing to bake, so Reg could take a loaf and give one to his ride back to college. I double it, so 6 loaves. The batter looked strange. Had I added the water? A moment after I added more water: lightbulb moment. It wasn't water - I'd skipped the sugar. 

I set bad-batter aside. Started over. Would 'fix' bad-batter later. (My fam would eat it). I took a pic of the two batters. Later I'd verify if bad-batter looked normal.

 . . . the slip up (I guess)

I dropped my phone Into the batter. Effffff. 

The phone still works, but phone call volume isn't  loud. Speaker phone is better. The failed batch? Edible. It had gluten, so no idea how 'off' it was. 

2. Kohls, Costco, Nordstrom cards, where art thou?

So much pumpkin bread, who even
cares which loaves taste weird?

I stuck these three cards in my pocket for a Costco run. Next visit to Costco - all 3 cards were missing. I checked pockets/purses/cars. I'm stumped. After beating myself up for days, I ordered new charge cards. 

What will I be wearing when I find these 3 OG cards? The suspense is killing me.

3. Rental oversight. Hmm.

We're driving to Florida for spring break. Curly is delighted that Tank is joining us. We spent a silly amount of time choosing an  apartment near Tampa. Cancellation till 2/25th. 

After we rented it, Curly noticed:  no TV in the living area. There are televisions in the two bedrooms. 

"I pooped in your
room, have a candle"

Back to the time suck drawing board, but will probably stick with it. It's a hike (40 min) to the beach, and a few people will need to sleep on air mattresses, but budget-friendly. I prefer further south. Coach resisted going south of Destin. Tampa's a compromise. Amazing pool and workout room at the complex, plus great reviews.  

4. Diaper disaster!

A few weeks ago, I got baby Curly from nap. This 19 mo Fav doesn't have curly hair, but  same IRL name as Curly. The light switch activates nothing, so I couldn't see. My sense of smell was TRIPPING. She'd stripped her diaper and become one with her excrement.

Her pack 'n play was
relocated to the living
 room where I could
air it out and wipe
 it down. What did we
do before Febreeze?

The next day she brought a gift bag containing a candle. Note:  Big Curly, This is to clear the air. I promise to be a better roommate. I died. 

She now wears a sleep sac for naps, backwards. 

5. wishing for a clone 

A dilemma vs. an 'oops'. Reg got in Tank's fraternity, so I know a lot of the younger guys and their moms. Mom's weekend is this weekend. Curly's playoff game is tonight. If we lose, season over. I'm not skipping her game.

Most freshmen moms aren't going to mom's weekend - prob because of they got in the frat 2 weeks ago. Tough I'd love to see the people I know that are graduating, etc. They won't be there next year. One option, drive 3 hours after Curly's 6 pm game. Sleep in Iowa, drive 3 hours Sat. morning. Return Sunday. Sounds like a lot. I'll probably skip. Womp womp. Coach prefers I skip. (the girls have a church ceremony on Sunday that I'd prob miss, but I'll be at the Easter vigil when they become Catholic and he will be there). 

Fingers crossed that Curly wins and gets to play again next week. I've been spectating my kids' sports at our high school since 2012. Any recommendations for my upcoming withdrawal? 

*****

Worst place you dropped your phone? Did it still work? Do you stick charge cards in pockets to avoid a purse? Has that landed you in where's my card mode? Do your people eat food you've mess up? Examples? Could you survive without a tv in the living space on vacation? 

Getting figgy with it: late, but being upbeat is timeless - right?

my fearless assistant, helping
me take the littles for a stroll

I'm here, doing stuff, like:  

• pulling Curly out of school Tuesdays during two or three classes (lunch, study hall, and sometimes AP Lit - because unfortunately that class is AP Lit in name only). She's my mid-day daycare assistant, since the infant twins have started and on Tuesday I watch all 7 littles (the oldest of whom is 2.5) . . . 4 of whom are still under a year. Big-guy turns 1 in a few weeks, and Miss-priss is 9.5 mos. The twins are almost 5 mos.

• enjoying the new garage doors - struggling to get the app to work, but I've

  

  I was pushing the 4 infants.
   Almost balmy out.
  
  
  

   asked Lad to have a look at the router's location, etc. next time he has a minute.

• prom dress shopping.

• meeting Lad's new girlfriend. She's LOVELY! 

• recovering from a day of crying last week when big feelings hit me hard in the sibling disaster. A rare phone call to Ed, who's usually too busy to answer his phone, provided me a new perspective, and he called me 'heroic' for handing my sisters . . . not sure that's the right word, but who am I to argue? 

• And . . .  while I'm not great at recording them in any way, shape, or form that jives with a share-your-fig post schedule, I am finding gratitude in things. (confused? I'm referencing Elisabeth's gratitude initiative:  Finding Joy in Gratitude)

Here is how other figs are shaking down from my figurative fig tree: 

Costco:  Am I the only one who locks in on eats and then bums out when those are no longer offered? Last week, a worker checked, and insisted they had my  GF protein bar - maybe the Magic Spoon mini protein bars that help me survive till my next meal. Anyway, 1o minutes later he admitted he couldn't find them. Then I realized I was leaving a trail of choc chips across the parking lot - a bag I bought had a tear in it. *But - Costco is done for 2 weeks, and I bought different bars, and we are lucky to be able to afford this truckload of food. 

I set up a playpen yesterday to keep these
two off the floor - it's like baby jail, but
 they needed to be out from under
the running-feet, book-dropping tots.

Twins:  These identical girls are so so cute, light as a feather, and so far - easy going.

Eye exam:  I hate getting my eyes dilated, but I scheduled it towards the end of the day and that's done. It just so happened that Kay had an away b-ball game in the same town where my eye appt was, so I bopped over there afterward. Lad showed up with his new girlfriend. me: Hi, nice to meet you, don't mind my pupils. I'm not normally this googly-eyed. 

Cousin reach out:  A few weeks ago, Mini's cousin (who also graduated from ND) texted her when she saw Mini post pics at a fun ND tradition for seniors. I felt relief that Marie's daughters might move past the difficulties. 

Bernadette:  Coach and I 'won' six tickets at a silent auction to see this musical. We took my parents, Kay, and Rae on Sunday. Bernadette is my dad's fav saint. The
musical was phenomenal. 

                Fun fact:  my folks couldn't agree on my name, and tried to leave the hospital without signing the paperwork. Mom got her way. In other words, my nickname was almost Bernie instead of Ernie. 

Valentine's Day:  Michelle sent me this sweet card, so sweet! Coach and I met our good friends for dinner - not because it was Valentine's Day, but because that was the date that worked. We so enjoyed ourselves.

Adoption preservation:  The adoption preservation therapist is meeting with Kay and I separately and soon will work with us together. She meets Kay at school, and sat and chatted with me Tues morning - my busiest day, while 4 infants napped and 3 toddlers sat and played with us. I appreciate this happening when it works for us in our home/school. 

Alexa:  I bought my folks an Alexa for Christmas, but it took a while to get it to connect to their Wi-Fi. Last night, my dad asked me to get Alexa to play De Dannan. His fav trad Irish music band. Alexa thought about it and then played Madonna. Let's give Alexa points for rhyming. After a few more tries, I got her to play the type of music he wanted - not the specific band. I taught him how to control the volume all from the comfort of his recliner. Then I apologized to Nana. (10 second video of Alexa agreeing to play Dad's preferred tunes)

THE WEATHER:  It's been freaky nice here - in the mid 60's. It'll get chilly again this weekend, but spring is in sight. 

*****

Anyone else have a funny 'my folks almost named me _____' story? What food do you miss when your grocery stops stocking it? Any funny instances when Alexa misheard or rhymed your request and came up with something else?