Italy: What I missed/What I noticed, & Mini's final art project

I'm pausing the daycare update to return to the Italy recap. I gather that you're all more interested in the Italy stories, plus the next daycare update is:  They love me, they really love me. It's sweet, but not pressing. 

Am I giving you whiplash with all of these topic changes? 

Italy:  

I missed:  

• Still water - Hold the bubbles, damn it. I don't like fizz in my water. To get still water at restaurants, we had to buy it. 
• free water - Slightly different than above. This is about a lack of water filling stations. I love a place to fill my water bottle. So many places in the States offer that (* you know who doesn't offer that? The Pacers athletic center where Curly played over the weekend outside of Indianapolis did NOT have water. They sold water bottles. How convenient.)
• free toilets - I think we, and by 'we' I mean me - the person who takes Miralax twice a day, only had to pay to use a bathroom a few times. So many places we went just didn't have public restrooms. Or if they did, beyond gross. 
• toilet seats - many restaurants/train stations offered a toilet bowl but no seat. Coach, alarmed, asked me at a restaurant after exiting the bathroom shared by both genders, Wait - what did you do there? Did you have to sit on that? (cringe face)
• running shoes - I sort of missed my running shoes, but I rotated between three pairs of shoes. My feet did fine. 

I noticed:  

• Just right - the restaurants serve appropriate portion sizes. It didn't seem like Italians struggle with weight issues, but I don't have any data to back this up. How do Italians maintain their girlish figures when there is gelato every three steps? -  ah - But, the gelato servings are itty bitty. We took the kids to Dairy Queen Sunday night, and I couldn't wrap my brain around their version of  SMALL. I digress . . . We never had a take home container. That being said, Coach sometimes got hungry AFTER we'd eaten. I was like:  You should've eaten more bread (she says with a hint of jealousy, since very few places offered GF bread). 

  

  This is the terminal when we were about
   to fly home. There are two TWO! smoking
   'cabins' - one on each end of this photo. 

• eating late - many of the restaurants don't even open until 6:30 or 7, or later. * I have a story about waiting in line to get a seat at a popular place, remind me. 
• business hours - see above:  so many places close up shop late afternoon until the evening. To nap, or relax? My kind of lifestyle. 
• so many smokers - Have they not heard of the health concerns? Do we need to have a public service announcement drafted in Italian? 
  

• 

  This is one of the smoking cabins.

  lunchmeat at breakfast - The hotels offered lunchmeat and cheese at breakfast, similar to a lunch spread. I packed sandwich baggies, as one does I do. Saving food from buffets helps the bottom line. I don't think we ever bought lunch. At noon, we'd sit on a park bench, and feast on lunchmeat and cheese, and protein bars from home. The meat stayed cool in my purse next to my cold water bottle. Granted it wasn't 80 degrees out. 
• tourist shops - inventory limited to sweatshirts. This is a very specific ME problem, but it's funny . . . 

Sweatpants search:  Mini texted Coach and I when we went to get something to eat while she was puking her guts out. Believe you me, I really didn't want to eat. Mini had held my phone to look at directions. We'd been together THE.WHOLE.TIME. I was convinced I'd be the next puker. Her text was a request for new sweatpants. Use your imagination. We stopped at all the tourist booths along the street on our way back to the hotel. Only sweatshirts and t-shirts. I gave her my pj bottoms, and I went without for the rest of the trip. 

How cool is this?

Coach and Lad decades
ago. I love this photo.

Final project:  While we were there, Mini needed to choose something to sketch and something to paint for her final project. She asked me for zoomed in photos, not a big group. We sat at a cafe and I sifted through my google photos. She chose a photo of Lad sitting on Coach's shoulders at Milwaukee Irish Fest, circa 2002-ish. 

Jumping the gun: the daycare finish line

I commented on Lisa's post over the weekend and my comment morphed into a mini-post, which prompted me to think:   maybe I need to share this on my blog. Maybe I'll feel better if I sort things out through writing it in blog form. So, I interrupt the potentially funny Italy stories (I have a few) to share my daycare dilemma.

1st and foremost:  everything is fine . . . I never dreamt when I started babysitting for one family that I'd end up making a decent income with a daycare. This year I babysat for NO SIBLINGS. I give a significant sibling discount, and it wasn't all bad to not take a pay cut for watching a small crowd. 

October '24.

I don't anticipate next year being so lucrative (there will be siblings), and that's OK. I'm framing '25-'26 as a building year. A while back, I thought it would be amazing if I could make it to TEN YEARS. Well, here we are -my 10th year is winding down. I'm not planning to retire yet. 

1.  I can physically do the work (um, the 25 lb 9 mo. old Shrieker has caused my back to complain) and

2.  I have the time. I've thought about quitting in order to maybe care for my mom if that need arises, but for now I'm sticking with it. 

Why not retire? . . . . Aside from earning $ for college tuition, I'm crazy about a few of my new families. I hope to babysit for them until their kids are all school age. Then maybe I'll be ready to stop changing flipping diapers. 

Here's how it's shaking out:  I intentionally waited until after Italy to ask my people what their plan was for next year, so I didn't stress about it. 

Do you want the same number of days? Different? Are you still planning to bring your little poop-heads to my house? (hee hee)

This year, I had 2 returning families, and 6 new families. That is a TON of new people. I'm exhausted thinking back on August when I welcomed/oriented 4 new families and then 2 more babies, one at Thanksgiving (the Shrieker) and one after Christmas (a pure delight). Phew.

Those leaving:  

Peter:  "Kate" teaches at our high school. Her son Peter was 2 in March, and started here at 5 mos. I find Kate to be wound tight and I sometimes feel like there's no pleasing her. She makes more requests than the other parents, like waking her son up from his nap to give him a snack before she arrives so she can avoid his grumpiness. I think the extra 20 minutes of sleep would do him good. The other guys wake up on their own or I wake them up when their parents arrive. Why not offer him a snack in her car?  (this isn't really a huge deal).

In February Kate texted me one evening, "Is Peter's bib at your house?" Now, c'mon. My evenings are busy. If his bib isn't in his bag, then safe bet I left it on his high chair here. We need to text about this, or can we just say OH THERE IT IS in the morning? There were a few other instances that rank higher than this nit picky stuff, but those require a separate post. 

Kate told me Thursday that he's not coming back. I had several dreams while in Italy that I had lost Peter, or that I let him sleep too long, etc. I told Coach, maybe Kate is stressing me out more than I realize. 

Peter is adorbs and we're crazy about him. I'll miss having him. I never felt a connection with his mom, which is fine. I don't have to connect with someone to care for their kid, but I felt like this contributed to the feeling that she was never satisfied. She's sort of all business. Hey, some folks are like that. 

Next year she's teaching part time, which I think is for the best. I think some of her issues are a reflection on her desire to stay home with her kid vs the care I'm offering. 

She says her folks are helping with his care next year, but they can't do Fridays. So maybe that means she's taking him somewhere new since I don't do Fridays? It is HARD not to take this personally, but at the end of the day when he was in my care -  he was truly loved and very happy. (he dies laughing at my lunchtime dance routines and my silly faces and my clowning. I suspect his mom doesn't have a silly side -and I'm not saying that's wrong, but he enjoyed the heck out of me). That said, it's like a kick to the gut. The 'I'm working part time' thing softens it. I need to remind myself that I really think this is more about her than it was me. She might have other stresses in her life that are in play. 

The Shriek Guy:  Shriek's mom, Maddie, "found someone closer to home" to watch him next year. 100% she's leaving because she's tired of me requesting that they determine what's wrong with their baby. He's over 9  mos now and he screams like he's in serious pain. I think I've pinpointed it to when he's about to poop. Once he's pooped, he's totally fine. Um, he poops multiple times a day. This isn't my first rodeo and I was unsure if I was gonna invite them back, because she just keeps saying that they don't see it at home. In other words they're not addressing it/she thinks I'm not taking good care of him, and that's why he's screaming? 

He's not screaming because he's not happy at my house, and I'm not making it up. Reg is home often on a Monday morning and he's like MOM, WHAT IS THE DEAL? The other kids in my care struggle to function when the screaming is happening. It's THAT unsettling. I can walk with him, cuddle him, feed him, distract him, sing to him. Nothing helps. Praise the Lord he's only here Mon/Tues. 50 kids could show up here on Wednesday and it would feel like a cake walk. I'm considering telling her not to bother bringing him back these last few weeks of school. Just don't know if it's worth it for me to deal with his issues. But Tuesday rolls around and EVERY week, I think - maybe next week he'll be better. 

Mini texted from Italy:  Can't wait for the next caregiver to tell them there's something wrong with their troll baby. (It isn't his fault, but dang - it is exhausting, and Mini's text made me laugh). 

BIG KIDS:  Two 3 year olds are leaving to go to full time preschool in the fall. They're easy and they're like a little old married couple. I'll miss them, but I saw this coming. Allie said to Carter in the backseat of the van the other day when we were on our way to the library:  We should talk about something. What do you want to talk about? ~ so cute. 

Coming up:  I'm gonna share the folks who are staying and more about the amazing new families who I can't quit on. 

(this got long and I've been in Indianapolis all weekend watching Curly's team win all 5 of their AAU games and my brain is too tired to edit it down anymore. It was 3 games, but teams that win keep playing, yikes - that was not on my radar and we got home at 7 pm Sunday).

**********

Am I alone, or are there work related things or other times that you wish you didn't take things personally, but yet . . . it just happens?

Bring on the Damn Pillow Sandwich

Coach and I zoomed with our amazing adoption/family therapist, Katlyn, on Sunday. 

The takeaway:  Katlyn was all about priorities. We sat each girl down Sunday before dinner and talked:  PRIOTIRY NUMBER 1 IS GETTING ADOPTED. We're all working on this and breaking trust by lying and sneaking interferes with that goal. We also discussed communication.  

Rae (who apologized after school Wednesday mere minutes before we left for the airport) rattled off her priorities, impressing us with her thought and consideration. 

She wept (and so did I) when I told her:  God brought them here to us, and we're working hard to connect, and it's not easy to be 14 and need to do THIS kind of work (I remember being 14 and it's hard enough without growing into/attaching to a whole new family), and it's not her fault - but here we all are. She's trying (she's come SO far - like lightyears), and that this was a setback and we're gonna stay the course, etc. We told her communication is key, and crushes are normal but 'Over the top' distracts from the priorities. 

Kay, who never apologized (mentioned when we sat down, I was gonna apologize. Sorry and that wasn't a legit apology, it was a weak ass shrug. She's def sorry she got caught vs sorry she did wrong), got a similar talk. We reiterated sneaking hurts our ability to trust, and we need trust to connect, and being sneaky/breaking rules doesn't help priority #1. And it's hard to have someone be part of our family when we aren't connected. 

We asked her what's the behavior that drives us bonkers:  'sneaking' (she's REALLY sneaky and she's been here for almost 2 years and it's exhausting) and has she told us before that she's done with that? 'Yep.' 

And yet? 

Then we asked her if she had anything to say:  Maybe you don't believe me, but 'the boy' and I aren't even friends anymore.  

Not surprising, she missed the point of the exercise. *sigh* I'm scheduling trust building visits with Katlyn, Kay and I (and sometimes Coach) once a week moving forward. 

Coach and I enjoyed
the art museum in
Florence, but when your
 husband notes that
this painting resembles
Glenn Close, it's time to admit
 we aren't exactly
polished people.

Silly me:  The first time I called Katlyn while searching for an adoption therapist who took our insurance, had openings, etc. (Lordy the number of calls I made), I asked her if we could skip the pillow sandwich type exercises . . . making a sandwich out of people by layering people with really large pillows. It's goofy as shit and I hoped to avoid it. Remember how we tried to adopt two boys back in 2021? Well, that didn't work out and let me tell you, Pillow Sandwiches were on the menu ALL.THE.TIME. 

Katlyn:  Sure. We can skip pillow sandwiches. 

When Katlyn and I chatted a few weeks ago about building trust, we giggled since I'm sort of begging for the damn pillow sandwich nonsense now. 

Last night:  A division 3 coach, who wants Reg, called him. As soon as he hung up, a division 3 coach (from my alma mater!) called Curly.  Coach and I planned to sit in on the 8 pm scheduled call. 

description of the painting in
 case you ARE polished.

I'd been reserving one way flights with mileage. Maybe we drive to SC for Easter and fly home? Long story. I was reserving seats, but it denied us
emergency exit row. The coach called  at 7:50 pm. When I returned to my laptop, I had to redo the  reservation for 6 of us AND, the seats jumped from 11K to 12.5K . . . in 50 minutes. We might not even go, but I'm fired up. 

Please pray for my dad. He's having a blood transfusion today. It should be fine, but one never knows. Something about his new cancer meds, his count, and he's so winded. I drove him to the appt and Ann met us there from her work. She's a nurse so I let her absorb the medical info. There was a lot of talk about blood though, and I didn't pass out. 

*****

So much more to share, but that's all for now. Have you been part of a pillow sandwich? Were you a willing participant? 

I'm back, Prego!

Florence sunset

Coach and I landed at O'Hare Friday afternoon and it's been nonstop.

Curly's travel basketball season kicked off. I knew this was on the schedule, but knowing it and wrapping my brain around it - two different things.  Her first game was Friday night at 9:10 pm, 30 minutes away. Coach stayed home, and I went even though aside from three naps under an hour each (2 on the plane and 1 before we drove to respite folks' home to pick up the girls), I'd essentially been awake since 11 pm the night before. 

She plays near Indianapolis next weekend and my brain had not processed that far out, but it's fine. I love basketball, right?  

* I don't love refs who stop calling fouls in order to rush a game along. Sat. night's 9 pm game didn't start till 10 and ended at 11 pm. I felt like I was being pranked, because C'MON, JET LAGGED OVER HERE. Someone (OK, me) had to stand up in the bleachers and remind them to use their whistles after Curly and another teammate were flipped onto their backs/flattened while involved in a jump ball with the SAME player in two practically back to back plays. Zero whistles. Nada. Call the damn foul, so no one gets hurt. Grrr. 

What I also don't love (this post is taking a whole different direction than what I planned, but rolling with it) is shopping for b-ball shoes for girls. If I was smart, I'd open a sport store that sells sport shoes for female athletes EXCLUSIVELY.

View of Florence from the bell tower
 of the Duomo. The stairs photo is my
view following Coach
up some 540-ish stairs. 

This message was brought to you by a failed basketball shoe excursion Sunday evening to Dick's Sporting Good, when I really just wanted to crawl into my bed (or write this post earlier so I could crawl into bed early-ish). 

When I wasn't watching a game and shopping for bball shoes:  I had the girls empty their drawers/closet and flipped their winter/summer clothes and collected SO much to donate. This is my least fav job and WHY did I decide to tackle it this weekend? I'm a little cray-cray. Then I did laundry, visited my parents, went to confession, attended mass early on Saturday before Curly's 6:30 pm game, worked out Sat, ran on Sunday, finished my chapter for my writers group (which meant going to bed at 1 am after Curly's late Sat game - in part because I was full of adrenaline as we lost in OT), bought groceries near the venue after Curly's Sunday morning game while she hung out at Culver's with her travel bestie who lives in the city. And finally and most importantly, Coach and I zoomed with our lovely adoption therapist, Katlyn, Sunday afternoon. A very helpful session . . . (I drafted the cliff notes, but have copied them into my next post - My version of cliff notes is not brief). 

The trip:  OH, YEAH. ITALY . . . we had a great trip. Lots and lots of stories. I thought I'd get to the Prego story referenced in the title. Maybe next time. We so enjoyed our time with Mini. We saw a ton (maybe a record number of Basilicas?, but when in Rome . . . see what I did there?) The worst part? 

Studio where Mini paint
and draws. So cool.

Mini got the Norovirus Sunday night, and was so, so, so sick. Tank caught the Norovirus when he was in Cancun for spring break (can't remember if I shared that ordeal), so I packed Liquid IV and that was helpful. We were relieved that it didn't hit when we were on a 2 hour train ride or touring Pompeii, hours away from our hotel, etc. Silver lining. Also, grateful I didn't catch it (Coach had it several weeks ago). 

*****

I never responded to comments before I left, life really did derail a bit with the girls' nonsense - but I did buy Bomba socks. They served me well. I took my Advair religiously while traveling (but skipped it too many times since we got back and feel a little cruddy, but maybe sleep will help). Looking forward to seeing what everyone's been up to. Have you gotten horribly ill while traveling? 

Ciao! the drama as we are about to depart

I am behind on reading blogs and responding to comments. Forgive me. I'm hoping when I plop on a seat at the gate while waiting for our flight I'll have some time. 

I've been making food, going to the doctor, and checking a million things off my list. And today was all about putting out fires. But first - 

My kitchen counter. Lists and
 snacks to pack galore. What if Italy
doesn't have enough GF food for me? 

Paper lists are my jam:  I like to travel with a paper list of where we're staying, etc. I sat down to make said list Monday afternoon right before I left for my doc appointment (I got an antibiotic just in case, but am hoping continuing with the steroid inhaler is sufficient). That's when I realized that I made the reservation for Rome from Thursday till Sunday and it was supposed to be thru Monday. Essentially we were gonna be homeless for one night. 

The hotel cis booked that night, but they helped me find another room. Technically they helped Coach. I handed him my phone as I walked out to the doc, so he and the guy could figure it out. It's a bummer, but if that's the worst thing that happens on our trip - no sweat. Coach was like - good thing you realized it now. Sunday isn't our busiest day. We'll have to move our stuff to a hotel that's a 5 min walk away. Stinky poop, but whatev.

On the home front, things are beyond stinky poop, so I wish I could go back to when the hotel room was the most challenging thing on my plate. 

Long story really short:  Kay and Rae are boy crazy. That's an understatement. Please do not tell me in comments how normal this is for their ages. We're a couple dozen notches past normal. I'll refrain from explaining, but trust me. My guess is they were taught at a young age that without a boy liking you, you're nothing. 

Gross. 

Anyway, we've been onto Kay and her down right obsession with this boy in her class. We called her out on it, and she lied. We found out that she and this boy are 'dating'. That might seem harmless and I get that they aren't doing anything, but she knows it's against our rules. And she lied. And this boy is not into girls but she wouldn't leave him alone, etc. etc. His mom works at the school, so I spoke to her about it and she was blown away. None of the teachers saw anything and it's a really small school. 

The teachers addressed it at school. The other mom discussed it at home with her husband and their son, and she texted me to let me know I was right. Her kid is in trouble for being deceitful, etc. Then she let me know that Rae is also dating someone. 

I was like C'MON! We went round and round with her last year and she knows the rule. 

The 'talk' Coach and I had with her tonight did not go well. She was incredibly disrespectful. She might end up missing her 8th grade trip (they go on a party bus to local spots and have dinner out, etc. and she's been so looking forward to it). It was like someone flipped a switch in her and she went dark side in the blink of an eye. 

I feel like the kids at the school were perfectly fine and innocent and sweet and then we enrolled our girls and they stirred the pot and got everyone all worked up and now people are in trouble and upset and damn it ANYWAY. 

We leave tonight, and Reg and Curly will be here with the girls for 2 days while they finish up the school week and then they get dropped off at respite care on Friday by their social worker. I'm not looking for advice or judgement about our rules (what we're doing isn't the same as regular parenting, trust me). We have a therapist, who is awesome - but this timing? Well, it sucks. 

I thought I'd post a few posts for your reading pleasure while I'm away, but I'm not sure I'll find the time before we depart. 

I hear Italy has wine. And on that note, Ciao for now.

mom's weekend and shadow photo moment and a sock question, etc.

Happy Monday! I'm desperately trying to get to bed on Sunday night, so I'll be brief. 

1. My apologies for not yet responding to the comments on my last (HORRIBLY LENGTHY/DETAILED) wardrobe post. Have you ever posted something and then thought - Well, that could've been done this other way/a better way, etc? Well, here we are. Anyway, I brought my laptop to mom's weekend at Tank's college and never opened it. 

I believe I took this photo of the shadow
 of my computer cord when I returned
 to the hotel at 1:30 am. I felt that the
 shadow resembled a bunny.
Makes sense, right?

2. Too busy having fun:  Tank's fraternity has not done a mom's thing (while he's been there) until this, his senior year. I enjoyed the heck out of it. Laughed my butt off. Met a ton of new-to-me moms, because some of the usuals weren't there. Would've been nice if Creighton won their game. We ate at a restaurant while watching the game and it put a bit of a damper on the evening. 

Tank wanted to me to stay at the Cottonwood.
 Um, he wasn't paying my bill, but I
 complied and it was a lovely experience.
The workout room was amazing. And yes,
 I did get up and worked out at 8:30ish
 the next morning after my bunny
 shadow picture taking night.
You seem surprised. 

3. Respite care is in place. I spoke to a woman that our social worker found for us. We chatted for 45 minutes and I feel good about leaving the girls with her/her family. She and I see things eye to eye, it seems. 

4. SLEEP:  The night before I left, Mini called. Damn it. She was travelling to Paris the next day and when she is about to travel, she often can't sleep. This was the case. Bugger. Last time it happened, we talked and she slept and I was so hopeful. But an hour later she called again. I cringed and wanted to bang my head against the wall when I saw it was her. Shit balls. Anxiety sucks. She managed 1 lousy hour of sleep before having to be up, but she LOVED Paris. Her fav city to date. 

I meant to take a photo of the hundred
guys and several dozen moms hanging
 out in the front of this house for a
Saturday afternoon party, but this
 is after people left. I was one of the
 last ones there. Surely
you aren't surprised. 

I didn't sleep great Thursday night - didn't eat anything after taking my Miralax (all because I was going to bed so early). I drove to Creighton 6.5 hours, while so tired. Then stayed out till 1:30 am Friday night, which thrilled Tank, because when Coach is along, we don't stay out that late. 

And then . . . 

5. ADVAIR:  I did a dumb thing - I stopped taking my Advair steroid inhaler a few days before I left because I WAS FINE. Well, shit. I was a mess Saturday night even though I went to bed after the bar vs going to a fraternity party. I wanted to be well rested for my drive home. Bah ha ha. At 2 am, I was wheezing. It's like that damn cold was only hiding out, but popped right back up when the Advair wasn't in action. I packed the Advair and started it again, but it take a few days to kick in. I'm really hoping to feel better before we leave on Wednesday night, and I'm not sure if I need an antibiotic. My cold symptoms are minor so long as I stay on the Advair.

Bonus:  I started the book The Rose Code, got it on an audiobook too (took me longer than it should've and added to my Thursday night frustration). I love it. I listened to a lot of it on my drive. 

*****

Have you read The Rose Code? Does anyone swear by their no-show socks? You know the ones that are barely a sock - more like a toe and heel cover? I hate the ones that slip off my heel when I wear loafers.  

Not-a-runway-model contender: my wardrobe choices for Italy photo dump, etc.

I leave for Omaha on Friday for Tank's mom's weekend, returning Sunday. I babysit M, Tu, W, and our flight takes off Wed. at 8 pm. I'm not quite in panic mode, but I'm in the pre-panic mode zone of 

WHAT SHOULD I DO RIGHT NOW WHEN I FIND MYSELF WITH A FEW MINUTES? WHAT HAVE I FORGOTTEN? WILL I GET EVERYTHING DONE IN TIME? WHAT NO-SHOW SOCKS WON'T SLIP OFF MY HEEL AND CURL UP UNDER MY FOOT AND DRIVE ME BANANAS?

Tank's text to me:

Rae got snippy with me after dinner Tues night. I was steamed. (Coach works late Tu/Thurs, of course). I went into my room and decided to take photos of the outfits I'm contemplating packing, in particular note:  WHICH SHOES GO WITH WHAT, because I'm hoping to only bring two pairs, maybe three??? 

I started out doing timed photos, but when I heard the girls come back inside after playing outside, I hatched a plan. I went downstairs and invited Kay to come up to my room. Rae was reading in the living room, probably wondering what we were up to. Hanging in my room isn't standard (not even for me, mind you).

I asked Kay if she wanted to snap photos of me modeling outfits. She was delighted, chuckling at the MANY unflattering facial expression photos. I was on a mission (these won't be included in the annual Christmas poem photo collage) and I was also not planning to include my face in the photos as they were for the blog-osphere anyway. Still, laughter and 'Do you like these shoes?' served as a bonding opportunity. 

My takeaway:  maybe I go shopping for new wardrobe items more often and ask the little girls to weigh in ? Or maybe I should plan to go out of the country more often? Or draft more fashion focused posts? 

When we were about 3/4 of the way thru my mound of clothes, I called Rae up. She FULLY enjoyed being in the loop/part of the fun. While I wardrobe changed, Kay took the liberty of flipping back thru earlier funny shots so she and Rae could die laughing. 

The library was gonna close and I'd intended to get a book. Kay reminded me she still needed a protractor. Blasted. I raced to the library. Then the grocery store to hold the fam over for the weekend and REMEMBERED the elusive protractor. Do not ask me how many trips to the store have been organized to BUY the protractor but no such thing has been purchased. Ugh. 

Today after school, I'll take a few minutes to 'splain to Rae how she stepped in it with me. (Coach already shared an overview of her issue while I was at the grocery, but I'll be sure she 'gets' it). 

If my life sounds exhausting right 'bout now, it really is. But at least I didn't go into space for a weekend and end up being stuck there for 9 months. Right?

We asked the girls' social worker if the girls can go to a respite placement during our trip. 

All along, we figured the adoption would be finalized when we travelled. Since it isn't, we could utilize this available resource. While we plan to have Reg, a couple of aunts, Curly, and Ed rotate as caregivers, the girls have made some poor choices lately (esp Kay). We're nervous about tasking the young and helpful Reg with the majority of their care. The girls will probably be unhappy about if this happens, but it might simplify things be less stressful. 

Photo dump . . . 

Mini HATED these shoes.
Very pricey
 and I have no problem
returning them. I did
some grab and figure
 it out at home shopping. 

Meet the shoes:  most are new or newish and I want to choose which I'm brining, so I can wear them around the house and be sure they don't hurt/need to be worn in. 

I might return a pair or two (def returning a pair that Mini saw a photo of and
HATED).  I do not mind investing in great shoes that I think will be around forEVAH. 

I asked the salesman for advice, when I bought the Paul Greens and the Vejas and the Mini-hates-them silver sparkle running shoes. (I didn't share a zillion photos of my outfits with him):  

Salesguy:  "My suggestion is that you just wear the shoes that you like, and if you go out with confidence, then you make the shoes work for you." 

Um, yeah. So, he basically challenged me to be a trend setter, and that's not my role in the universe. I can break a record of diapering, and loading 7 tots/babies in my big ass van. I can bake a crazy good batch of cookies. But capable of making lasting fashion statements? No sirree. 

*note that the blog refused to let me have any say in where the photos landed, thus the disordered alphabet system below. 

#1 White Veja fashion sneakers seem to
work with a lot of the outfits. Ed's girlfriend,
Leah, liked them. Ed died laughing,
seeing them as nursing home fashion,
seeing as the shoes have Velcro closures.
Curly had a similar reaction. Let's preface
 this with:  Curly typically
 wears sweats and hoodies. 

#2 Ron White tan loafers. OMG - crazy money, but I first bought them on sale at Nordstrom to think about it. Then found them at Von Maur for $100 LESS than I paid for them at Nordstrom. I think I'll probably keep them, even if I don't bring them on this trip. 

#3 black loafers, I bought them
 last year, and I admit that I
 forgot about them. Started wearing
 them the last few months. They're
 comfortable until they're not,
 so not a great choice for
 loads of walking. Sam Edelman. 

#4 Mephisto. I bought these on a
 great sale- a year ago? Initially
 I wasn't crazy about the gold
 fleck in them, but this brand
 doesn't disappoint in terms of
 comfort, bonus:  not as
clunky/heavy as loafers #3. 

#5 Silver Paul Green fashion sneakers.
 Really comfy, but not sure
they dress up the outfits
 I need dressed up
 (assuming I take the nursing home
 Vejas with the Velcro).
 If I don't bring them,
 might return them. I
 hate to pass up on a great deal, but
 these shoes were crazy pricey
 even on sale. Hello, Paul Green! 

#5 Paul Green silver shoe profile,
 because if they're going be returned
 we might as well admire them first, right? 

#6  Black and white
fashion sneakers. I bought
 these in January and they are really
 comfy. Leah really liked them
 with most of my outfits. 

#7  Mephisto flats. These are
 really comfy and
 maybe I bring them as
my third pair
because they don't take
 up a ton of space.
Maybe they serve as dressing
 up some outfits. 

I was gonna go with the black North Face
that has a hood and is water resistant,
 but then I saw this trench coat.
 Also water resistant, and has a hood. 

The North Face.
Hmm?

Outfit A:  Love this sweater, but
 it was dumb pricey, and I think
 I'm gonna take it back. It's
Eileen Fisher. There are sweaters
that look like this for less, and I don't
 NEED it. I do love these black
 pants. They have a wax
like finish to them. 

Outfit C:  This navy shirt
 and these
 blue/gray pants are new.
 Love them. The pants are
 Rhone. *Also bought them in
 black. They were on sale.
They do not wrinkle and were
 exactly what I was wanted
 for traveling. I'm
 not crazy about
 ankle length
(issues from my
 childhood wearing shorter
older sisters' castoffs). 
I know they're
 acceptable, and I'm
working thru it. 

Outfit B:  I'm not wild about
 super wide legs, but these
 pants are the exception.
 So soft. Kut from the
 Cloth brand. Full length,
 yeah. These will wrinkle. 

Outfit D:  I'm wild about this
 little zip up sweater for layering. 

Outfit F:  The red shirt is new.
 I bought it for Curly and I to share,
 but then ordered another one,
 because we didn't want to share.
 It was marked down so low.
 I think you can see the
 pants better in this pic. 

Outfit E:  Thoughts on the red
 striped shirt under the red
jacket? I do have other pants.

Outfit G:  Thoughts on this poncho?
 I've had it for years - I feel like most of my clothes are solids and this is a little fun.
Curly hates it, almost as much as she hates the silver shoes. I tried the poncho on with a
 white shirt under it too, I think the black is better. I think it looks decent with the
 blue gray ANKLE lengthpants. (I'm shouting about the length)

Outfit H:  Blue
jacket with
 the black
 ankle pants.
Loafers? Shoe
 suggestions?

Outfit I:  Ankle pants with
a fun shirt I've had for a few years. 

Outfit J: Black scoop neck dress
with Lulu leggings. 
The great dress debate.
 Bring both dresses? Which shoes?
 I've had this one for years,
light weight. Gathers in the
 skirt at the sides, cute
 little details. 3/4 sleeves. 

Outfit K:  black scoop
neck dress with
the flats. Hmm?

Option L:  black scoop neck
with the black soccer
 shoe looking fashion sneakers.

Option M:  WHAT HAPPENED HERE?
If you've actually scrolled thru all
 of these photos, I decided to
sneak in one legit 'me' photo.
 Might delete it eventually.
 With the Mephisto loafers.

Option N:  Kuhl brand long
sleeve dress. I love it.
My girls are 'meh' on it.
 Not sure I care. But knowing I'm
 not big on accessorizing (does
 a jean jacket count as an
 accessory?), does it make me
 look like I lost my way from
 the nunnery in Rome?
 There's a touch of
 wool in the dress, so it's
 a bit warmer/more substantial
 than the scoop neck.
 My idea of being a little dressy.

Outfit O:  Being lazy
and demonstrating
two shoes at once. Me wondering
 if the sliver shoes work here.
Might not even bring this
 poncho thing, but better
with the blue/gray pants?

Outfit P:  or with the Vejas.

Outfit Q:  making a case
for the tan loafers. If
I'm wearing black so often,
 thinking I leave this pair at home.

Outfit R:  This is a bright
 tunic that my kids
make fun of on the hanger,
but on - it's cute, right?
 My mom bought it for
 me for Christmas several
 years ago. I don't wear
 it much, because it's
 a LOT, but it wont wrinkle. 

Outfit S:  I bought these
two shirts (this one's green)
 when we went to see Ed in
 Budapest in 2022. They don't
 wrinkle. Leah suggested I
 wear a shirt under and unbutton
 part way to make it look less
 blah? Not sold on
 bringing either of them. 

Outfit T:  same thing, cream
 colored shirt, silky
but heavy. With Vejas.

Outfit U:  I love this cream top
that I bought in the fall, and
 I decided this makes the cream
Eileen Fisher sweater unnecessary.
Again, my thinking is that the tan
 shoes aren't gonna work with so
 many black pant options. Thoughts?
 Like would you pair the tan
loafers with either of the
 black dresses/leggings? 

Outfit V:  The girls cracked up
 at my silly poses. This tan
 striped shirt is the same
as the red striped one. 

Outfit W:  not sold
 on bringing the
 jeans jacket, but it is
 my go to for layering. 

Option X:  Same green shirt option
with the black fashion sneakers.

Me using the timer before the girls stepped in. 

Are you still here?

THAT WAS MORE THAN YOU BARGAINED FOR.

Open to your suggestions. It was a lot (and I'm still committed to just the carry on and the personal item), but do you have 4 or 5 favorite pieces/outfits/shoes? I will not be hurt if you hate/strongly dislike something. 

I have teenagers. I'm wicked thick-skinned.